And at #11...Juan Pierre's first home run as a Dodger!

Usually, when Bill Plaschke thinks thoughts and then writes them down, bad things happen. That's never been more true than now, when Plaschke responded to Manny's epic grand slam from the other night:

http://www.latimes.com/sports/la-sp-plaschke24-2009jul24,0,2198246.column

This time, it's not so much his writing style that's stupid and tired (although the one-word paragraphs make me want to puke), but it's what he's writing about. The Manny Granny apparently prompted him to think of other great Dodger home runs, and put them in a list according to, I guess, importance and impact. Or, what should have been importance and impact; in fact, I'm not really sure what he uses as the criteria for the list. Here's the whole thing:

10 The Giants Lose The Pennant, The Giants Lose The. . . . The Giants Lose The Pennant, The Giants Lose The. . . . Mike Piazza hits two home runs on the final day of the 1993 season to knock the Giants out of the playoffs and clinch his Rookie of the Year award.

9 Wrigleyville Blackout. . . . Wrigleyville Blackout. . . . James Loney hits a grand slam in the first game of the 2008 division series against the Chicago Cubs, silencing the Wrigley Field crowd, killing the Cubs' spirit, leading to a stunning three-game sweep and the Dodgers' first postseason series win in 20 years.

8 The Fergie FlashThe Fergie Flash. . . . On the final Friday of the 1980 season, Joe Ferguson hits a 10th-inning walk-off homer against the Houston Astros to spur the Dodgers to a three-game sweep, forcing a one-game playoff against the Astros for the division title.

7 Gibby Before Gibby. . . . Gibby Before Gibby. . . . Gibson could never have pulled off his 1988 World Series heroics if Mike Scioscia didn't nearly equal that feat in Game 4 of the National League Championship series with a ninth-inning, two-run tying homer against New York Mets' ace Dwight Gooden.

6 Sweetest Of All. . . . Sweetest Of All. . . . Sweet Lou Johnson hit a homer for a lifetime, in the fourth inning of Game 7 of the 1965 World Series against the Minnesota Twins, giving Sandy Koufax all he needed in an eventual 2-0 victory.

5 Monday, MondayMonday, Monday. . . . Although he's known more for saving an American flag, don't forget the time Rick Monday saved a National League flag. In the ninth inning of the deciding Game 5 of the National League Championship Series in Montreal, Monday went deep off Steve Rogers to give the Dodgers a 2-1 lead and the eventual victory, which later led to a World Series title.

4 Four Plus One. . . . Four Plus One. . . . It was the first time in the history of Dodgers ninth innings that fans were fighting to get back into the stadium. Of course you remember the four consecutive homers to tie the San Diego Padres, but do you remember the order? Jeff Kent, J.D. Drew, Russell Martin and Marlon Anderson, with the final two coming on the first two pitches from future Hall of Fame closer Trevor Hoffman. The only thing more Hollywood occurred an one inning later, when the Dodgers won the game on a walk-off homer by a guy who initially couldn't play because of a sore leg, one Nomar Garciaparra.

3 BobblebombBobblebomb. . . . The last thing you need to know about the impact of Ramirez's home run is that, in the clubhouse afterward, Casey Blake was boogeying to a celebratory rap song. Yeah, Casey Blake.

2 Disappearing Act. . . . Disappearing Act. . . . I've still never seen the ball that Finley hit to win the division over the Giants on the second-to-last day of the 2004 season, have you? I was there, I was watching, the hit disappeared into the sun above right-center field, Finley jumped up and down, the roar shook Chavez Ravine, I'll never forget the roar. But I never saw that ball, and I wasn't alone, with Vin Scully memorably noting that wherever it was, whenever it came down, the Dodgers would be champions. Of course, the Giants never saw it coming either, leading 3-0 entering the ninth inning before giving up seven Dodgers runs.

1 Gibby Being Gibby. . . . Gibby Being Gibby. . . . More than two decades later, is the improbable becoming the impossible again?

Allow me, on behalf of all Dodger fans, to say: Huh????? What???? I mean, of course Gibby and Finley have to be 1-2, but 3-10 are just...wrong. For one thing, his #10 home run is actually two home runs, and his #4 home run is actually four home runs. And the order is utterly and completely out of whack.

As great and as fabulous and incredible and unlikely as the Manny Granny was, it can't beat out other home runs that came at much more critical times. I'd say that Scioscia's has to be #3, because that was easily the second-least-expected big home run in Dodger history after Gibson, and it was what propelled the Dodgers to the upset NLCS win over the Mets. And Monday's has to be fourth, because it basically won the freaking pennant.

After that, it becomes pretty subjective. I'm strongly in favor of only considering one home run for each spot, and unfortunately there the four-home-run game gets devalued because you either have to pick Nomar's homer (that won the game) or Marlon Anderson's (that was the fourth of four to tie it in the ninth). So maybe you could sneak the Manny Granny in here, but I'm more in favor of this spot belonging to Loney's slam; I mean, all of the air went out of the Cubs' balloon after that. They never even threatened the rest of the series, and that allowed the Dodgers to pull off one of the most shocking playoff sweeps in history. So that's my choice for #5.

Number six is where I put Marlon Anderson's homer. Very few times in my Dodger fanhood have I actually leaped off the couch in joy. Loney's slam did it for me; so did Finley's. And so did Marlon's homer, probably the third-most unlikely big home run in Dodger history. And Plaschke points out that Manny got a "dugout dogpile" as if it had never happened before; Marlon got a much bigger and longer dugout celebration after his shot.

And number seven is where the debate comes in: Nomar's walkoff homer to win the four-home-run game, or Manny's slam? You know, I have to vote Nomar here. What many forget is that the Dodgers, after tying that game in the ninth, immediately fell behind 10-9 in the top of the tenth (and it could have been a lot worse if Kenny Lofton hadn't reeled in a long fly ball at the center-field fence with two on), and losing that game after such an incredible comeback would have scarred many Dodger fans for life. And yes, that was a "leave the couch" moment as well, one that's captured forever in an SI photo on my bedroom wall. So that's number seven.

Then you can stick Manny eighth, and then come the last two spots. I've only ever heard about the Sweet Lou homer in Game 7 in '65, but I guess Plaschke was there for it and knew how important it was, and I should take his word on this choice. (Wow that was tough to say). So that's #9. And at #10, I'm putting Dick Nen's home run against the Cardinals in the 1963 pennant race. Very obviously, I wasn't there to see it, but the story is great: The Dodgers' once-great lead over St. Louis in the NL pennant race falls down to just a couple games. They call up some nobody from nowhere named Dick Nen (father of Robb, by the way) purely to add a little depth to the roster. The Cardinals throw the great Bob Gibson at the Dodgers in an attempt to cut down the lead even more. It's 5-4 Cardinals in the top of the ninth, when Nen (who'd come into the game as a pinch-hitter a few innings prior) comes up with his first career hit and home run, a solo shot to tie the game at 5. The Dodgers go on to win in 13 innings, and the victory propels them to win five out of their next six to easily clinch the pennant. And get this: that home run was Nen's only career hit as a Dodger.

Yeah, Mike Piazza cracking a few homers to eliminate the Giants is cool, but can you really beat that?